Anyone want a SHAG?

An attractive girl at work the other day yelled out

"ANYONE WANT A SHAG?"

Not being of a particularly shy disposition, I kindly volunteered!

She was outside up against a plate glass window, so I came up on her from behind.

She struggled a bit at first, but I gently put my hands around her and held her until she calmed down.

Talk about beautiful! I was fascinated, and I couldn't take my eyes off her for ages.

She was a lot softer and smoother than I imagined her to be.

She made quite a racket initially, and thought perhaps I was being a bit rough, but she quietened down after I whispered sweet nothings in her ear.

Now, I have held a few birds in my time, but this one took the biscuit, and was quite a humbling experience, and as strange as it may seem, it was probably the first time for her, AND for me!

As the saying goes, "seize the day" or as the old Australian song goes "don't you ever let a chance go by" I saw the opportunity and grabbed it - to hell with the consequences - I mean what was the worst thing that could happen?

She may bite or kick or scratch me, but what the hell - I was willing to take that risk for a few joyous moments!

We then came inside and I showed her off to all my workmates, who had a bit of a laugh at my expense, so I took her back outside, where I said my goodbyes and released my grip on her . . .

It wasnt until then that I realised I had been tricked!

I thought I had a shag -

but in fact was really a HERON!
(that flew into a plate glass window at the rooftop premises where I work, and could not find how to get away.)

and then she FLEW AWAY and I haven't seen her since!

I know - I am a CONSERVATIONIST!

But I have long been a practitioner of the TAG AND RELEASE PROGRAMME!